It’s been eight months since moving down here from Indianapolis. It took five months alone to find a full time job. And I jumped at the opportunity for this job because of where it was located. I could get into low-income housing that is unlike income-based housing that I have ever seen; really great quality without the worry of getting murdered by man or creature. Shortly after joining the team, I was notified that I was actually moving to a different location, that would no longer be in reach of this amazing income-based housing. So now I’m stuck at a low-paying job that doesn’t allow me to be independent but make too much to get into the very gross-quality, low income-based housing in that area.

I moved here to be closer to family. I made the move to eventually have my family be all in one place again; growing up I couldn’t wait to be the farthest from them all, but as an adult I want them as close as possible. But since moving here I’m starting to ask if this was this the right decision for me? I don’t make enough to be independent. I had such an adverse reaction to the damn noseeums that it caused a staph infection and has left my legs permanently scarred. And now I have decided to go back to my old career (retail management) that also does not pay nearly as well as it did in Indy. Why am I here? Sure my family will eventually be together again and near me but that will be because I’m probably living with them. Is my independence more important than my family?

My family always tells me, “do whatever makes you happy,” but how am I supposed to choose between independence and family?

At this point I am closing my eyes, and throwing darts at job boards to see what sticks. I’ve started to apply for retail management anywhere USA and whatever happens happens.